THE LEGEND OF "DORK’LATE"

I want to get the dream I just had down on paper, because it’ll probably fade away if I wait too long.

In my dream, I was the owner of a new coffee shop/bakery in Manhattan. But the establishment was what my dreaming brain apparently considered dork-themed. The walls had framed "Lord of the Rings" movie posters, as well as Spider-Man pin-ups by John Romita and Sal Buscema (Things I remember seeing in an old comic book shop). A TV hanging from the corner blared Japanese cartoons. And there was a modest shelf of paperbacks, above a table that had Rubiks cubes and that old puzzle thing that was a bunch of interconnected rings.

Though we had a working kitchen, the only thing we made fresh were chocolate chip cookies (Hence the name "Dork’late," an amalgam of "dork" and "chocolate" ). We also did not serve soda; there was coffee, tea, and cartons of milk on ice. Though I personally cannot handle milk, I would expect any establishment I owned in the vein of "Dork’late" to serve a good hot chocolate. It just seems to fit the theme. Remind me to check if "Dork'late" has hot chocolate on the menu when I go to bed tonight.

K. was hanging around my new coffee shop/cookie hut, of course. In the few minutes my dream entailed, she made such practical suggestions as having sandwiches from a nearby deli brought in every morning. "Because some customers might actually want real food," was how she rationalized it.

Apparently, she also had a hand in acquiring some of our more valuable props. When I first saw the table of Rubiks cubes and puzzles, I said, "Wow. Where did you find a retail outlet that sells brain teasers wholesale?"

"Oh, I found them all in a big box someone left on the curb," K. replied. I dropped the Rubiks cube I was holding like it bit me. Guess I thought they were brand-new. Silly me.

All in all, I think this new dream establishment is a much better idea than dream establishments in the past. Remember the film-noir-themed diner? Despite the great ambience, it was a terrible flop. Perhaps I shouldn't have featured a menu where everything was "hard-boiled." Hey, seemed like a good idea at the time.

(A final note: I swear a blood oath on this: If I ever turn out to be the proprietor of a small business like "Dork’late," all my full-time employees will receive reasonably good medical coverage. I also plan to have our brain teasers sterilized on a daily basis, and if any sick people handle them, they will be destroyed (By "they," I mean the brain teasers, not the people.))