YAY, 'CRUEL WORLD!'

This morning, I was perusing the weekly newspaper "Dig," which is sort of like Boston's answer to "The Onion." An item in the write-in column "Oh, Cruel World!" caught my eye, and I feel the need to reprint it. Something very similar happened to me on Puerto Rican Day a few years back, when I refused to buy a dinky toothpick flag from some shit-eater who was probably on his way home from drunkenly molesting white women in Central Park.

Whoever wrote this letter should try taking a walk through Union Square on a weekend.

"Dear racist, activist poseur,

I was on my way to work and you were parked outside my building holding a ratty clipboard, harassing people. As I went by, you stopped me and said, 'Help fight racism.' I politely told you that I needed to get to work, at which point you turned into Angry Black Man and started talking shit about how 'Asians are all prejudiced against blacks.' What. The. Fuck? Until you revealed your own ignorant, racist ass by making that comment, the fact that you were African-American and I was Asian-American was completely incidental. Normally when fuckwads say shit to me on the street, I just keep on walking, but I pointedly said, 'Excuse you?' at which point you actually proudly repeated yourself, shouting, 'I SAID, WHY are all ASIANS prejudiced against BLACKS?' Yeah, I heard you the first time, asshole. How dare you claim to be 'fighting racism' when all you do is stand there, publicly spewing racist assumptions at people? What's the matter, does it hurt your ego that people may be in a hurry on a weekday morning and not be able to stop and listen to you?

You're not a part of the solution; you're an active contributor to the problem. Even more offensive, you're a racist in activist guise. You're an embarassment to your supposed cause. No, I'm not prejudiced against blacks. I'm prejudiced against any hypocrite motherfucker who thinks he has a right to a piece of my time."