LOCAL NEWSPAPER, LOCAL SPORTS TEAM

From the (online) pages of The Brooklyn Downtown Star:

Some Pretty Girls Play One Ugly Roller Derby Game

Last Saturday, the Gotham Girls Roller Derby League returned to the Schwartz Athletic Center at Long Island University’s Brooklyn campus. For the season’s third match, the Bronx Gridlock lived up to their name against the Brooklyn Bombshells, stalling the home team’s effort to claim their second victory in a row.

Thanks to strong defense, a terrific effort from star Gridlock jammer Bonnie Thunders, and aggressive – some might argue too aggressive – blocking all-around, Bronx routed Brooklyn, 87-69. Thunders led all scorers with 46 points on 13 jams.

It was the Gridlock’s first victory in their inaugural season, after losing to the Queens of Pain by three points back in May. Their manager, Captain Easy, said his team showed improved focus this time around. "We’ve had a lot more practices, and as far as [team] chemistry, we had a chance to really get it back together," he said.

His team came out with a greater sense of urgency than Brooklyn, which still seemed to be riding the high of defeating Queens in their last bout. But overall, it was a messy, foul-ridden match, as skaters from both sides spent significant minutes in the penalty box.

After the game, Bombshells Captain Anne Phetamean admitted that Bronx did a better job taking advantage of her team when they were undermanned. "Bronx had lots of penalties, too," she said. "We couldn’t capitalize on their penalties, like they capitalized on ours."

Ejections proved particularly costly for Brooklyn during an early second half jam. Three of the Bombshells’ five skaters landed in the penalty box, leaving their team at a severe disadvantage. The jam started with physical defense from the Bombshells’ Li’l Red Terror and Penny Larceny on Thunders, which escalated when Terror put a hit on the Bronx jammer. Later, a Bronx skater retaliated, knocking Terror aside.

Eventually, Thunders would rack up ten points to Brooklyn’s zero, putting the Bombshells in a deficit that they would struggle to climb out of.

The sight of a Bronx player rallying after getting knocked down, as Thunders did, was symbolic of the entire game. At the same time, the physicality seemed to take Brooklyn out of its strategy. Bombshells’ Co-Captain Ariel Assault was limited to five points, all of which came on her first jam. Midway through the first half, she received a vicious shot from a Bronx player, and appeared upset at the officials in later rounds.

Clearly, certain Bombshells felt that Bronx’ playing style transcended physical, becoming downright dirty. Following the defeat, Brooklyn manager Richard Cranium declined comment, while one of the Bombshells’ top skaters, Sassy Hipsaw, commented that "the old Gridlock had better blockers."

But her teammate Phetamean was more gracious in defeat. "Bronx was a closer match [than Queens]," she said. "Queens was not all there. Bronx has a deeper team, they’re new, they’re scrappy, and they play real hard."

Still, one expected a better showing from Brooklyn, given how they handled their last opponent, which also relied on one skater for most of their scoring. Thunders, however, got solid support from teammates Pop Rox and Brigitte Barhot, who racked up 34 combined points on ten jams. For the most part, they were able to score at will against the Bombshells’ lackluster team defense, while Brooklyn, paced by Hipsaw’s 20 points on six jams, could not keep up.

Bronx began overwhelming its opponent towards the end of the first half. With the Gridlock up 23-21, Barhot scored two points as her teammate Beyonslay sent Brooklyn’s Leggs Luthor flying into the crowd. One jam latter, in a face-off between both teams’ star skaters, Thunders outscored Hipsaw seven-to-four, despite stout defense from the Bombshells’ Anne Phetamean and an especially ugly check courtesy of Li’l Red Terror.

While she delivered plenty of ear-ringing collisions, Terror also occasionally brought Brooklyn to life on the offensive end. Shortly before halftime, she raced through a cushion created by a Phetamean hit on Barhot, circled the pack, then managed to sneak past Bronx’ blockers along the inside lane. The tactic yielded nine points, and left the Bombshells down only five.

During the second half, Terror showed tremendous skill again, alternating between the inside and outside lanes of the track. After maneuvering past Bronx’ Beyonslay and Beatrix Slaughter, she burned Sugar Smacks for five unanswered points and brought Brooklyn within three. Unfortunately, they would not sneak any closer. The Gridlock outscored the Bombshells 28-13 over the remainder of the game, with 16 of those points coming from Thunders on four jams.

In the wake of what must have been a physically and emotionally-draining bout, Phetamean, described by announcers as the "heart and soul" of her team, made sure to mention that the Gotham Girls are still looking for a full-time practice facility. Right now, the league rents the LIU athletic center for bouts. Phetamean, however, said that the venue is not always available when the university goes on summer hiatus.

The Bombshells captain did expect things to get better in September, once the fall semester begins. In the meantime, she said that the league, which is young but growing in popularity, would continue to train wherever they can find space. "Right now, we’re practicing outside in the rain," Phetamean said. "It’s tough. But we’re here, and we’re not going anywhere."